And you must be the Monopoly guy! Permalink: What's the password? Could you please speak in to my good ear? - Roger Podacter: Nice to meet you, you were highly recommended by Martha Metz. I'd like to ASS you a few questions! Yes! In fact, if one were so inclined, one could make quite a lucrative law practice with little else. He smashes the dog to the ground. - Ace Ventura Melissa: You really love animals, don't you? Now how you gonna solve that one? Woodstock: What's the password? Ace Ventura: That's a true Albino pigeon. “- Ace Ventura: Don't kill me! She said she heard a scream, isn't that right Ma'am? 2. Please! Camp: Well, does he have a name, or should I call him "lawyer"? [mimics Tangina character from Poltergeist] I have exorcised the demons! Ace Ventura: This is double-paned sound-proof glass. Ventura: No, kill him! Ace's latest case involves the apparent kidnapping of the Miami Dolphins' team mascot, Snowflake the dolphin (natch). I just want to know how much time I have. Ace Ventura: Ah, I can never remember that. Interesting sayings and dialogs. [at the crime scene following Roger Podacter's death]. Ace: Come on! [looks suspiciously at Camp], [Lt. Einhorn is pointing a gun at Ace's head]. Hey, maybe I'll give you a call sometime. She's Ray Finkle! ALLEY - CONT'D As the UPS Man/Ace rounds the corner, his shirt opens up at his pot belly and the Shiatsu's head sticks out. Oh, yeah. No quotes approved yet for Ace Ventura Jr.: Pet Detective. Ace Ventura: Yes, Satan? That's okay sir, we'll finish the rest. Mr. Shickadance: Oh yeah? Ace Ventura: All righty then! There is no way that neighbor could've heard Podacter scream on the way down with that door shut! Melissa: Did you have any trouble getting in? I know there's a lot of riding on it, but it's all psychological. Lois Einhorn: What's the point, Ventura?! Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) Description; Trailers (9) Youtube Videos (0) Posters (1) Quotes (34) Comments (28) Change Logs; Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes 35063. Ace Ventura: If ⦠She was half-dead when I found her. Man: Shut the hell up, you stupid mut. Podactor: [shakes Ace's hand.] Your number's still 911? First, I'd establish a motive. Would a real woman have to wear one of these? Perhaps some Banaca? Friends fans will appreciate the presence of Courtney Cox, who remains admirably straight-faced as the Dolphins' publicist and Ace's would-be girlfriend, but of course it's Carrey who steals the show with shameless abandon. Sound clips of funny quotes, famous lines and sound effects from the Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) movie soundboard that you can use as ringtones. He announces, âThat was close one, ladies and gentlemen. Ace Ventura: Warning. Check this out. Ace Ventura: Ah, I can never remember that. Ace: Oh, there is just... one more thing, Lieutenant. I have a package for you. Kill him! The last two years have been extraordinary ones for jim carrey. Eight years ago our son escaped from Shady Acres Mental Hospital in Tampa, and they're still bugging us to pick up his stuff. [takes him down and holds his face near the dead bug] Now, kiss and make up. Mr. Shickadance: Oh yeah? Scene from the Jim Carrey Movie Ace Ventura Pet Detective (1994) [Melissa drags Emilio into the area with a gun pointed at him] Don't shoot. 12 Feb. 2021. All audio samples can be downloaded in .mp3 format. Aguado: Homicide, Ventura. Woodstock: Is that the red or the white? Aguado: Why, you- [tries to attack Ace, but he misses]. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective movie quotes. He behaves like a criminal animal. Huh?! your own Pins on Pinterest This woman is Roger Podacter's neighbor, she lives across the hall. Sound clips of funny quotes, famous lines and sound effects from the Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) movie soundboard that you can use as ringtones. Ace, I'll have the plumbing checked immediately.. Then I'd lose 30 pounds...porking his wife! Ace Ventura: "Jock!" White. You just have yourself a good day. He's the one you want! Best Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes. He's a lawyer. Ace Ventura:[turns around to face Emilio] I think I can keep him under control, but you're going to have to tell me who's working the Snowflake case. Now how ya gonna solve that one? Fiction can be fun! All righty then. Lew-Who, Za-Her.”, “Warning... assholes may be closer than they appear in the. Ace Ventura: Mr. Shickadance, I told you - you're my first priority. Well, that famous line turns 20 years old today. Dippers' are those who dig in into different issues and make commenta…, The human race is not defined by the language that we speak, but by t…. Ventura: Only this... [walks out to the balcony and begins singing like an opera singer while opening and closing the door; no one can hear him when the door is closed] This is double-paned soundproof glass! Huh? [takes deep breath and begins speaking at a faster clip] What you WOULDN'T read about is how Ray Finkle lost his mind, was committed to a mental hospital, only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker, manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino whom he blamed for the entire thing! Ace Ventura: If I'm not back in 5 minutes.....Just Wait Longer 29041. “That was close one ladies and gentlemen, of course in every contest, there must be, a loser. Share the best Ace Ventura: Pet Detective quotes collection from FinestQuotes. Ace Ventura: Alrighty then. Camp: [nervously] Very, very well, thank you. He held the ball wrong, remember?! Ace ⦠Ace Ventura: Good evening, Captain Stubing. (opens door) What do you want? Ace Ventura:[using his ass to talk to Emilio] Excuse me! Mr. Finkle: What do you know about Ray Finkle? Some rich guy lost it. I heard 'em again this mornin' scratchin' around. Ace Ventura: ...and a clean pair of shorts. Oh, yeah, the bitch. Ace Ventura: New England clam chowder. Ace Ventura: I came to confess. Ace: [pointing at Einhorn] SHE'S NOT LOIS EINHORN! All audio samples can be downloaded in .mp3 format. Ace: [laughs] Let's just see who's lying, shall we? Please! Ace Ventura: Good question, Aguado. White. Ace Ventura: You're certain you had to open this door? First, I'd establish a motive. --Jeff Shannon, https://www.quotes.net/movies/ace_ventura:_pet_detective_quotes_50, Respect is like a religion. Lois Einhorn: What the hell is he doing here? You cost me $25,000, Polly! (lifts package). "Alrighty, then!" Losers? Yes Satan? Ace Ventura: I never bring my work home with me, sir. These famous words of wisdom is offered by FinestQuotes.com, the best quotes collection on the web. Around it's neck is a business card that reads, "You have been had by Ace Ventura - Pet Detective." Yes! Emilio: This is not the time, Ace. You know Jim Carrey's iconic catchphrase from the cult classic, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Dan Marino: Hey Ace, got anymore of that gum? × Aaall righty, then. Ventura: [to Melissa] Oh. [pulls on Einhorn's hair, assuming it's a wig] Boy, that's really on there! Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes. Just gotta stay in a positive frame of mind. These famous words of wisdom is offered by FinestQuotes.com, the best quotes collection on the web. [Ace walks over to Marino, who whispers to him about something that leaves Ace agape] Ladies and gentlemen...my esteemed colleague, Mr. Marino, has just brought some new evidence to my attention. [Door opens] Ace Ventura: Yes. Ace: Goodnight, everybody! You m…. Ace Ventura: Well I hope so, had I been drinking out of the toilet, I might have been killed.-- ⦠Ace Ventura: I'm ready to go in, coach, just give me a chance. “- Melissa Robinson: Ace get out of the tank. Mar 1, 2014 - Alrighty then! He found Captain Winky!! [startled at Einhorn shooting into the air]. Woodstock: Is that the red or the white? Ventura: [starts making his way out with Melissa while looking at everyone, holding his fingers like an L] LOSERS! Dan Marino: No, kill him! But if I am mistaken...if the Lieutenant is indeed a woman, as she claims to be...then, my friend, she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I HAVE EVER SEEN! We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. She was half-dead...â (continue) (continue reading) MovieQuotes.com © 1998-2021 | All rights reserved. Ace Ventura: Soccer style kicker graduated from Collier High June 1976, Stetson University honors graduate class of 1980, holds 2 NCAA Division One records, one for most points in a season, one for distance, former nickname "The Mule," the first and only pro-athlete ever to come out of Collier County and one hell of a model American. Go back in time to experience the 14 best quotes and scenes from Ace Ventura Pet Detective (and maybe a âWhen Nature Callsâ quote or two). Mr. Shickadance: I heard animals in there, Ventura. There is no way that neighbor could've heard Roger Podacter scream on the way down with that door shut. Ace ventura pet detective 2 quotes. See more ideas about ace ventura, pet detective, good movies. I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll. Sorry sir you sounded like someone else. He's the detective! I'll never tell anyone, I swear... [indicates Marino] He's the one you want! Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes. Emilio: Hold your fire! Ace Ventura: [leaning at the bottom of the staircase] That's a lovely wrap you're wearing! She's a man! [gasps for air]. Ace Ventura: The pages are broken down by the first letter of the movie the quote is from. Aguado: Homicide, Ventura. Now, history has certainly shown that even the most intuitive criminal investigator can be wrong from time to time. “- Dan Marino: Hey Ace, got anymore of that gum? As soon as I find this bird, you're paid. Ace Ventura: I have exorcised the demons... this house is clear. Aguado: What the hell are you talking about? Oh, I'm sorry, sir. Ace Ventura: Excuse me sir, but do you have a mint? Ace Ventura Pet Detective Quotes Below are our favorite Ace Ventura Pet Detective Quotes that will make you laugh. - Roger Podacter: What? In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's dick and became insanely jealous. He's our pet detective. “- Ace Ventura: Good to see someone who doesn't buckle under the pressure. Ace: You realize what you just did. Oh, yeah, the bitch! Melissa Robinson: Roger Podactor, meet Ace Ventura. Ace Ventura: Ah, I can never remember that. Ace Ventura: No Sir, I'm just a very big Finkle fan, This is my Graceland. Then I'd lose thirty pounds, porking his wife. Einhorn: HE KIDNAPPED SNOWFLAKE! Ace Ventura: Is it number one or number two? Melissa: You know, you're just mad because your stupid little pebble theory didn't work out and you don't know how to express your anger. Ace Ventura: If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer. Lois Einhorn: SHUT UP! Nice to meet you, you were highly recommended by Martha Metz. Lew-Who, Za-Her. Initial here, and print your name here, We'll get the rest of the forms out to you as soon as we can. Scene from the Jim Carrey Movie Ace Ventura Pet Detective (1994) Ace: (to the manager) And you said you had to open the balcony door when you came into the room? Unfold your inner strength by setting a good example to others. Huh? "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes." Ace Ventura: HDS sir, and now are you doing this afternoon? [walks off with Melissa and Roger standing in disbelief]. Ace Ventura: Once you get inside my head, thereâs no turning back baby. Dan Marino: "Cry baby!" The 1994 box-office hit that turned comedy maniac Jim Carrey into Hollywood's first $20-million man, this gag-filled no-brainer stars Carrey as the titular rubber-faced gumshoe who tracks down lost pets for his heartbroken clients. Lois Einhorn: Ventura, when I get out of that bathroom, you better be gone. Ace Ventura: That's a lovely dog you have there sir, do you mind of I pet him? Then I'd lose 40 pounds... PORKIN' his wife. I'll be here all week. But I find the reference section much more enlightening. I'm on a very big case right now. It is more than just a lifestyle. How would you like me to make your life a living hell? I think I'll kill the dolphin first, I wouldn't want you to miss that! He killed Roger Podacter, and he was just about to kill Dan Marino and ME! If Einhorn comes in here and sees me talking to you or your ass, I'm history. Finkle: DIE ANIMAL BOY!! Yes. Ace Ventura: [begging] Don't kill me! Ace Ventura: WOW., Ray Finkle's house, I can't wait to meet him, Ace Ventura: But your wife said you expect him home any minute. Permalink: What's the password? Lois Einhorn: Listen, pet dick. Thereâs gotta be receipts. Mrs. Finkle: If he had held the ball laces out like he's supposed to, Ray would never have missed that kick. But I doubt very much if he could find the time during his... busy schedule...to get rid of big ol' Mr. Knish! You smell terrific. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective trivia Trivia : When Ace enters the club to meet the guy with long blond hair and glasses, the song playing is "Hammer Smashed Face" by death metal band Cannibal Corpse. Ace Ventura: That's none of your damn business and I'll thank you to stay out of my personal affairs. I heard 'em again this mornin' scratchin' around. Assholes are closer than they appear. Ace Ventura: I never bring my work home with me, sir. And so goes his pronunciation of the word âloserâ in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Mr. Shickadance: I heard animals in there, Ventura. A goofy detective specializing in animals goes in search of the missing mascot of the Miami Dolphins. If I'd been drinking out of the toilet, I might've been killed. His investigation is a source of constant aggravation for Miami police lieutenant Lois Einhorn (Sean Young), who turns out to be packing more than a pistol under her skirt. New England clam chowder. [looks at the tank area] Is that the tank? Now, this is an insurance form. Ace Ventura: Martha Metz? In a lot of Jim Carrey performances, we see him take a word weâve heard a million times before and say it in a way weâve never heard before. One viewing may suffice for a lot of people, but Carrey's hyper antics have made Ace Ventura: Pet Detective one of the bestselling videos of the 1990s. I thought I heard you call me Ace. The scream she heard came from inside this apartment before he was thrown over the balcony, and the murderer closed the door before he left. Ace Ventura: Well, I have kissed a man. The Monopoly Guy: Who is this ghastly man? - Ace Ventura: Martha Metz? STANDS4 LLC, 2021. This house is clear. You've been a wonderful audience! How are Gopher and Doc this evening? Look, honey, there's the hors d'oeuvres. Your number still 9-1-1? Ace Ventura: She gets flooded, we'll just have to wait a second. Ace. For some reason, I assumed everyone would think I made up âAllllllrighty then!â and âI have exercised the demons!â Apparently I was mistaken. Mr. Finkle: Are you another one of those "Hard Copy" guys? Ventura: Tom Ace. You sounded like someone else. Quotes. alrighty then. Best movie ever! There are no losers in the world of honorable men. Assholes are closer than they appear. Ace Ventura: [speaking through his rear opera-style] Assholiomio...Osodomia...Lea-- [sees Lois Einhorn] HOLY...testicle Tuesday! Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes with Sound Clips - page 20. Spre…. - Melissa Robinson: Roger Podacter, meet Ace Ventura. 1. Ace Ventura: No, the guy with the rubber glove was surprisingly gentle. In this case, the killer saw the size of the bug's dick, and became insanely jealous. Melissa: Put your guns down or this cop gets it. Come on, look at the guy! [Gestures and makes sounds of a slow-motion picture and stops] Einhorn: [everyone stares in shock] GET HIM OUT OF HERE! Ronald Camp: I'll have the plumbing checked immediately, Mr. [rips Einhorn's skirt off, believing she is hiding a penis, but she appears to have the normal figure of a woman] Heh heh...oh, boy. Eyebrowsing is when you look at any person judgementally. “- Ace Ventura: Assholomio...Osodomia...Lea-. Hey maybe I'll give you a call some time. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. He's offering a $25,000 reward. [cocks gun and puts it under Emilio's chin]. What's all this pet food for? Ace Ventura: Receipts, what about receipts? Emilio: Hey, I can't do nothing for you on that one. Discover (and save!) Share the best Ace Ventura: Pet Detective quotes collection from FinestQuotes. Ace Ventura: See that you do. Lois Einhorn: What would you know about pressure. Huh?! Lois Einhorn: Youâve done some fine detective work⦠âAceâ. As soon as I find this bird, you're paid. Is that the ... Added: September 02, 2007 Oh, yeah! Can ya feel that, buddy? When a football team's mascot (a dolphin) is stolen just before the Superbowl, Ace Ventura is put on the case. My hands are totally tied. They NEED to make a third movie. Can ya feel that, buddy? Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell. Discover and share Ace Ventura Pet Detective Quotes. Ace Ventura: [Hops up] I'm gonna execute a button-hook pattern, super slo-mo. Pleasure to meet you Mr. Camp, and congratulations on all your success. Ace Ventura: Most likely sir; I bet it was something nice, though. Ace Ventura: I came to confess. Huh? Jim Carrey is a fan of Cannibal Corpse and insisted they appear in the movie since it takes place in Florida, the "capital" of death metal. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Quotes with Sound Clips - page 19. Ace: That's a good question, Aguado. - Ace Ventura: Pekingese, hyperactive, lost in Highland Park area. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Fickle is Einhorn, Einhorn is Fickle, Einhorn is a man. Ventura: Pekingese, hyperactive, lost in Highland Park area. Alrighty then." Ace Ventura: If the lieutenant is indeed a woman as she claims to be then she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I have *ever* seen! Logged in users can submit quotes. . Some rich guy lost it. Kill him! In this case the killer saw the size of the bug's DICK and became insanely jealous. Ace Ventura: That was close one ladies and gentlemen, of course in every contest, there must be, a loser. For instance: if you were to look up professional football's all-time bonehead plays...you might read about a Miami Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle, who missed a 26-yard field goal in the closing seconds of Super Bowl XVII. How is everyone feeling tonight? What's all this pet food for? Ace Ventura: Soccer style kicker graduated from Cauler high June 1976, Stetson University honors graduate class of 1980, holds 2 NCAA division 1 records one for most points in a season, one for distance, former nickname "The Mule," The first and only pro athlete to come out of Cauler County and one hell of a model American. [rips open Einhorn's blouse, revealing her breasts] That kind of surgery can be done over the weekend! I was just telling Melissa that one of the first things we learned back at Stanford Law was the modern proliferation of food poisoning claims against wealthy private homeowners. Woodstock: What's the password? Ronald Camp: [Ace emerges soaking wet] I'm so Sorry Mr. [Ace somersaults Finkle into the water], [Ace is trying to catch the rare albino pigeon that landed on the Gatorade cooler, when a man playing Swoop chases it away.]. To be a Pet Detective, you have to understand both the criminals and animals. Oh my God, Einhorn is a man! Yes. [Ace grabs Einhorn and spins her around revealing a huge penis tucked behind her legs, making everyone gasp in shock] THAT'S why Roger Podacter is dead! I mean it! The scream she heard came from inside the apartment before he was thrown over the balcony and the murderer closed the door before he left. [Door opens] Ace Ventura: Yes. Huh?! GRUFF MAN Son of a bitch! Web. He breathes fire. Ace Ventura: Iâm sorry. Ace: Oh-ho-HO! Ace Ventura: That's a true Albino pigeon. Ace Ventura: I'm in Psychoville and Finkle's the Mayor. But tell me this...would a real woman be missing these? Be sure to tip your waitress. Leh-hew, ze-hers! Ace: Ace Ventura, Pet Detective.