he will come back in few minutes and apologize but those words will continue to hurt me forever. 4. I can’t always talk to him, so I write him letters. I’m glad you enjoyed my letter to Julian. He’s a really neat person and even irons his clothes. My son probably thought I abandoned him because he didn’t hear from me. I wonder if their eyes will become moist or if this post will elicit emotions in them. I’m sorry. The poem written by the author, found at the end of the book, warmed my heart. Whether you have a son or daughter, my advice to you is to be honest and bare your soul. We all know there are two sides to every story and I’ve added both sides. And of course he still wants his mum when he his sick – just like in the old days. Read my lack of responsibility before you deliver an answer. I sometimes open my mouth and out walks my mother. Yet I am mindful that they need to live their lives, as they do and I had to learn to let them go!! Since the epilepsy he has extreme depression in which phsycosis and paranoia episodes occur. Post the pictures online as if it was all their prom. I’ve been doing so since he was a baby. I’m sorry. Address the money issue. I’ve sent dozens of letters, birthday cards and Christmas cards to my son and received no reply. My son was a late … (In fact, at the end of this post, I share my review of this book with you.). LOL He’d fit right in! I like how you pointed out that “the right set of readers” is important. Before I send this letter please allow me to ask a few questions. I may not have disciplined you enough, or maybe I disciplined you too much. I’m grateful for it. It's still not clear, despite an inquest. Taught the Children’s Group at church five years having over 60 kids in class. She managed to sway him too. I love my son so much it’s overwhelming. Then maybe being a VA is RIGHT for YOU. You have already made my life so much more beautiful and one day when you have your own children I hope that … While he will not admit this is about the girl, we all know the unspoken truth. … I am divorced from my ex for 35 years. He responds to my text messages right away and even picked up the phone when I call him. Write your sons letters… even though they won’t be able to read them yet. I’m happy I shared this, too, Donna. I was only twice your age once. Evolution. I enjoy a great relationship with my mother, and this post made me appreciate it even more. To a son we couldn’t be more proud of, It’s not every day that … When I text him I never receive a reply. You were 18 then. A Mother’s Open Letter To Her Son Will Bring You To Tears. Ridicule and self-loathing were not things you were going to experience! I start my letter with the following: "I want you to know that I've enjoyed every minute that I've been able to think about our future together as I've done this financial planning. I can’t even imagine the pain I put him through. The cops thought I was uncooperative when I wouldn’t tell them my name or address. Your son must be as proud of you, as you are of him. Rudra Khatri recently posted…8 Best Water Purifier in India (2020) – Latest Buyer’s Guide. The reason I won’t allow the cosmetic surgeon to touch it. [=I paid after it was due.] I know. Its a release for me. What I consistently find are Mother’s of Adult Estranged Sons – for 3 years, 1 year, less than a year. Most don’t comment, though, so I’m really hoping some will speak up. You can do anything you set your mind to… including getting clean and getting your kids back. I feared that you would soon be asked to leave that too. I think the letter was what moved me the most because it showed us your feelings for him all through the years, right from the time he was young to the present day – very well written indeed , Thanks for sharing. His mother and her husband dress up in their attire to have pictures made with our son and his date on prom night. You never let yourself get in a predicament like that again. I hope with all my heart that you slipped away quietly and with some clarity and relief. Never could do drugs in college as an athlete we had drug test (we drank). But that’s okay with me. I guess his early “training” of folding socks and towels taught him something! My son rejected me for 3 years. Started feeling sorry for myself and loathing in self pity wondering – why this happened to me? It’s a start and I am very happy that I wrote that letter. Your foresight and sensibility astonishes me. Having no access to drugs my entire life then to have all you wanted I didn’t manage it very well, to say the least. I lost my Dad 10 years ago this year and there were never words left unsaid. Please, always remember that. In my case I lost my son when I divorced his father he was 17 at the time and took the divorce very hard. Picture. You didn't often realise anything was wrong with your life, but it was hard to be close to you and watch the rapid deterioration in your personality, and intellect, and the complete lack of purpose and ambition left within you. I now sing it to your little cousins. Not every story has a happy ending, but fortunately, this one does. Until then, you have to live your own life!!! I have a son who I am very close to. Wording Well: One of the Top 50 Freelance Writing Blogs! The problem is that the wound will never ever ever heal and Im left with this for the rest of my days. Joanna, my heart goes out to you. and i agree with the rest of the group you should definitely start the book. Please be informed that my son Abhishek Desar is studying in grade 4 in your school. I hugged and kissed him every day, I caressed him when he had pain, rubbed his head almost every night and never will I forget how he smelled each time I held him. Son is so angry with his Dad for what he did and now is furious with me for not telling my ex I won’t be helping him out any more. Darrin, everyone deserves to be loved, even you. My daughter has been estranged for 17 years, and my son for 10. It is not easy as this happened to me 8 years ago and I was heart broken. Kevin, THANK YOU so much for all of these kind words! I hope I will always recognize your face and your voice. Clearly. Do you send “care packages” to your son? I demonstrated how to sew and fixed one of the holes. I couldn’t tell them I didn’t know. You were my boy, my precious, baby boy. To have an impromptu hug from them is the best gift of all. About me, I went to college on a basketball scholarship but didn’t graduate due to knee injury. He doesn’t believe in Santa, but Santa’s going to be extra nice to him this year! When you were two, I wrote you a song. I feel I am not alone. On one particular Tuesday evening, he showed me a sweater he bought. Read on and don’t forget to share. Do you know that you mean the world to me? This imperfection in my smile that reminds me of you. You became convinced that random people wanted to hurt you, and turned into a social recluse; the reality was that you were quite a forbidding figure whom others would cross the street to avoid. Yeah, that may sound stereotypical, but stereotypes exist for a reason. I am so sorry you are going through this. Happy tears of course but makes me so emotional trying to find the right words to express how much I love you and how special you are to me. Who didn’t want to pay child support and yet the father who my son thinks is wonderful. It is now going on 10 years I have been estranged from my son. My son (only child) is 24 now, haven’t seen him in over six years. I don’t think they understand what goes into a marriage and that it takes two no matter who’s at fault. No matter what you may wish would not have happened, when people and emotions are involved, unless you have walked long days in their shoes, their lives are not yours to judge. My son and I were inseparable, I coached his baseball team, his basketball team, taught him to hunt and fish and all the things my father taught me, but most importantly, I taught him how to love and how to live to love. He came to Thanksgiving at my parents house and I got to spend time with him. Yet you pretended not to know me one day when we were walking downtown, shopping, until you wanted something. How am I in the middle? Now he is doing better and it’s time for me to let him go again, and once more, as his mom, I’ve done my job. You were always so active and wiggly. I finally got a guy to speak up! You’ll be my baby forever, even though you are a grown man now. So I did. It’s not easy being a parent. Remember our little, plastic, red, first-aid kit? Oh how those mothers teach. The healthy habits you formed early on in life have helped you become the strong, young man you are today. Oh Lorraine, I feel every word that you write here about your son. In a Petrochemical Plant they tested for drugs and alcohol weekly and was more stringent at the consulting firm. I stroked your forehead and hair when you were sick. Before completing my final few college classes I accepted an offer to work for a Training and Consulting firm. Respect is earned not demanded. I know there are two sides to every story but every thing I said is factual, period. You got soul Lorraine! We got back in touch with one another, thankfully. When they left home I was devastated and had to learn that I could live my life, still with them as my boys, but in a different way. I do have nieces and nephews though and a step-son I only reconnected with about three years ago now. Have a heart-to-heart. The only thing I ever want from them is their company and their time now and then. Steph.” I wrote an open letter to Steph, which TODAY.com … Your letter was really moving, it brought tears to my eyes. Why am I being used as Punching bags for his problems? It takes time for them to grow and experience life themselves. Because that is what we do… we hurt the ones we love. I sacrificed aspects of my life to enhance yours. You were in charge of socks. Ah…that letter surely touched my heart and I could feel all that you must have felt those years you were away from your son…. Teaching you how to try your hardest even when things aren’t easy. Do you recall our ritual of checking the candy when we got home, to make sure it was safe? Immediately went to work at Petrochemical Plant in operations and started college classes while working. with those two girls. “I just want you, Mom,” was your response. When I almost lost my leg and had to undergo major surgery to save it, our roles were reversed and you took good care of me. To my son, we may not have had as much time together yet, but you changed my life too. I don’t know how this could be made into a movie, but maybe my other book could! It touched me in explicable ways. after fighting with your friends one night during a sleepover way across town, I refused to pay for a cab, even though I told you I’d always be there for you, because I wanted to teach you a lesson about consequences. I, too am a single mom. As you know I have two sons, 31 and 25. She is controlling of him and I no one will explain why. If we were 100% anything, there would be NO need for evolution; no evolution, no reason for soul. It’s great that he now tells me that he loves me, too. Yes it’s lovely. Thanks, Greg! Instead of the greatest dad, I was the greatest disappointing dad. I’m sure you can guess what happened… he was left with two gaping holes as a result. When you were arrested for shoplifting, you couldn't stop smirking and giggling, even though you explained that you didn't think it was funny. A letter to … my late son, who had schizophrenia. I just want you, son, too. Good luck to you! And talk to me if you need to. Too often, authors forget to identify their target market. He has never had a fabulous relationship with his father. I’m very grateful for that. When the parents are a disappointment it shames the child and the parent, I’m guilty on three occasions. I also saw that you have posted on your blog about this. I’m fortunate to have him in my life now, and even though he doesn’t write like me, he does send me the occasional email, always sends me texts, and calls me, and sometimes Skypes with me. After my accident I lost my friends. I took a deep breath. do you have any letters from your son to be included? I didn’t have any friends because I didn’t recognize them nor did I remember their names. This is my only child and I love him more that you could imagine. You are my single-most biggest achievement. When you lost your teeth, I became the Tooth Fairy. Mine is now 23. If your son goes to school, send the letter to his school. An Open Letter To My Son › Relationships. My son was living there at the time. When I was on my deathbed I thought about the life I had lived. But I love him so much and want to understand all there is to know . You truly have a gift, and I meant each and every word. My son also lives with his dad. updated January 8, 2016. I wish I could offer you some comforting words, but I know nothing I say will fill your void. My aspirations for you dwindled until my only aim was that you were reasonably content and did no harm. You formed opinions of your own. I could never convince you that your disease could be treated, because it wouldn’t let me. You are free to unsubscribe at any time. Thank you for sharing. I suggest you speak to your son. We are currently – and still – strengthening our relationship (YAY!) I’m smart enough to realize if I don’t tell you both sides, how could I truly expect a reliable answer. The father who didn’t want to see him when it was convenient for him. I’ve never asked her why nor have I requested her to pay. I’d like to say I did my best after my accident but I would be lying. You go to the gym enough! Your work helps other people reach out for help, keep it real with themselves, and with others. Love her with everything you have, love her with all your heart, be faithful to her and show her (don’t just tell her) you love her EVERY DAY. The first letter I wrote was when he was 19 and I never got a response but I am still trying. You never knew, until I told you. 02 A letter for his college graduation. I loved those moments, even though I hate sewing! Instead of simply asking me to sew them, he asked me. These can give you some ideas about writing your own letters to the people you have hurt with your controlling, disrespectful, and abusive behavior in the past if you choose to do this task in your own life. To prevent this I started sending checks and money orders but she put her name on his checking account and cashed the checks. So now, I am putting together a book of letters to my son! Use the judge's correct title, with the words "Your Honorable" in the letter's heading, and use either "Dear Judge (last name) or "Your Honor" as the opening greeting. I have written my son many letters and poems over the years, and I wrote this letter  after reading I Will Never Forget, a memoir by Elaine C. Pereira. When I should have been thinking – why not me – what makes me so special? . Now that I taught him how to sew, it makes me wonder what I can teach him next. Soul. Keep up the great work! If I could only smell the scent of my son again maybe my broken heart could mend. I know you will do great things and I am already so proud to call you my son. My step mother refuses to let me see him for any closure. If so, I bet he likes them! a little comment to support you. I encouraged you to be great. The book? To my precious little boy, Thinking of what I want to say to you already puts me in tears. I am sending you a huge hug to give you some love and some strength. I wasn’t the same person, I knew it and my son knew it, there were times I couldn’t remember my son’s name. For the first two years I had to take medication for physical therapy when learning how to walk again along with other medication for the head trauma. Thanks! I can’t compete with that nor do I want to. You were diagnosed with disorganised schizophrenia, which manifested in your inability to function in daily life, and your inability to stay focused on anything. Your letter is beautiful and I’m sure the book is a tear jerker. Letter to my Teenage Son (from Mom) Dear Son, I have one job. I wish you and your son a wonderful relationship. As you know there is more to this story. I’m not perfect, I’ve had my ups and downs during this journey but I did my best. thanks again and merry christmas to both of you, max, Thanks for your comments, Max; I appreciate your kind words. I was 18 and in pain, physically, when you were forced into this world. Your email address will not be published. I spend months in-and-out of the hospital trying to regain normal physical and mental functions, my recovery time would be four to five years. As it turns out, he still needs me, but in different ways. To my Dear son Jeff, I want to apologize to you from the depths of my soul for how my actions became so totally out of control, resulting in tremendous hurt to you and Kyle. Hi there, I enjoy reading through your post. Tears streaming down my face. Showing you how to have manners. At any rate, keep writing him… even if he never reads your letters, you will at least have gotten things out onto paper. Call him. Dennis, congratulations on your new addition!!! I closed my eyes, tried to quiet the rest of the world. I’ve never even been sent a pic of their baby girl, sent pretty crocheted blankets, little dresses and shoes for her, a cheque, this was never cashed, now Christmas is coming, I wish it would end, I’ve bought cards, thinking of including a letter to him, will send a cheque too, I love him dearly, the hurting isn’t getting any better with time. I tried teaching you right from wrong, and to treat others with respect. I am so tired of everyone acting so fake and perfect, the facades most people have are sickening. By looking at me and speaking with me you would never guess I had an accident. You may recall it as “the bad house.” I did everything in my power to protect you. Through the author, the reader gets to know her family, and is able to identify with them as memories are related and glimpses into the author’s personal struggles are revealed. I did the best I could with you and for you at the time, but it wasn't good enough and I ultimately failed to protect you and keep you safe. So open up, and let your experiences help propel you forward! Because I have eating and weight issues, and have had them all my life, I never wanted you to gain an extra ounce. My son’s mean the world to me in I lost due to my drug addition they have recently got a adopted in I am missing them SO much they are almost 3 and 4 my days are long in nights even longer I find myself crying daily they are the first thing on my mind when I go to bed in when I wake up I have A hard time being in public seeing other KIDS because it reminds me of mine I have no clue where they are cept the city in adopted parents first name I have so much guilt in shame in am hurting so much I don’t no me anymore sence the boys have been removed I am so lost in so hurt I constantly think about what they are thinking my oldest asked the worked one day where I was she told him she didn’t know she could of told him the truth that mommy’s verry sick in needs to get better or something like that I’m scared they will for get about me in most of all I’m scared I’ll never get to see them how do I go on 28th my life with out the 2 of them when there part of me in my life in how do I except that I won’t be part of there life or know anything about them in how do I write a good bye letter to my own kids any one have any answers or advice to help me get through this . Be true to yourself always. I cannot wait to see the expression on his face when he sees his many gifts! I feel your pain. Diversity. When you’re closer to death it becomes easier to talk about it. Funny story – I now spend most of my Tuesdays with my son. Without diversity, evolution doesn’t happen. I was a single mom, too, so I can relate to your friend. This hurt him so bad, I could see the pain in his eyes and could feel the sorrow in his heart because I felt the same. The company would reimburse us for tuition if you maintained a 3.0 GPA. At your funeral, people tell me about the person you were before you were my father. I will pray for you and your son. I told you “I love you” constantly, daily, always, because I do. My son never received one letter or card and obviously no money. It hurt like hell. You’ve worked long and hard for your muscles, your abs, your rock-hard body, seemingly made of steel. You had fun matching them. Nothing in existence is perfect; nothing is literally the ONLY thing that can be 100% any one thing, only because it’s nothing. I haven’t the words you have and am not a writer so I take comfort from someone like yourself who can put this into words for me. By subscribing to my list, you agree to allow me to email me your free e-book as well as join my email subscriber list. I know of a mum here who can relate well with your story though I’ve seen her in pains. First I want to say that I miss you. Even as a teen, he didn’t want me washing his clothes. It’s funny how I remember certain things, too, and when I asked my son about them, he had no idea what I was talking about – we each have different memories. Don’t be so hard on yourself. 10/9/2022 Mr. Scoop Palm University 10500-1955 Dallas. I think I must have pushed him too hard but I wanted him to have a good life. When he was seven I got custody and raised him as a single father while his mother had visitation. It took us a while to get to the point where he felt comfortable enough to speak those words again, but we’ve been there for a while now, and I’m so happy about it. glad you decided to share it with us and that your son agreed to have it published. I ask you, is a typed letter ok, or do a few mistakes disrupt the meaning? You know I’m not a mother but I so admire Mom’s, especially those left to raise their children on their own. Lorraine said it best give him time to mature. This side of my son is so hard for me to comprehend . A year ago, a sky lantern crashed in my front yard. I also embarrassed him in front of his friends a few times. I love hearing from people who read my writing! 3. You were so big (whatever they say, your massive weight increase was caused by the anti-psychotic medication you depended on) and difficult to love unconditionally near the end, that I failed to realise – or wouldn't admit – just how vulnerable you were. Naturally, I’m going to remember things differently than he will/does, but certain things stick out in my mind more than others due to their sensitive and important nature. I am just “not the Mother on her spec-sheet” is the way I always put it. I paid for heat to keep you warm. a letter that one man wrote to his son, and an example of a letter that one woman wrote to her daughter. Write your child a letter if you are unable to talk. I’m sorry you got hurt in this way. We all seek to be happy and we flee from rejection and pain. A Letter to My Dead Son. Don’t text him. Thank you so much for dropping by! “I Will Never Forget.”. Don’t want to be the MIL that I have. I bought you toys. My TRUE TALE for today is a bit unique, because it involves me writing a letter to my son, whom I re-connected with in 2013 after being estranged from him for about three years. I’m really looking forward to your comments, too. I have a son. What’s meaningless to me may be a big deal to my son because of the integrity he wishes to uphold. I don’t know how to get through the pain and hurt I feel. You have touched my heart with your heartfelt words, your unconditional love and care for your boy drips from every line and yes, you went through hard times and it wasn’t easy by any means for you both but there is a clear message of redemption, forgiveness and healing here which is what I, as a reader, want to see. Keeping still for those few minutes required drastic measures! You say you don’t remember that incident, but I do. I am happy for all the Mother’s who have re-connected with their adult child – they are the lucky ones. If he has blocked you then continue writing him letters or send a card letting him know you are thinking about him and love him. As you say here, and Alice above, all we want to know as their mums is that we are needed! I know you think you failed him, but from what I just read, you were and are a very loving and caring mother. Have a great Christmas! And, 20% to 25% of the time I took too much medicine and probably lost a great deal of respect from my son, I know I did. So my son will not be able to attend school from 24th February to 27 February. FYI, he’s now 26. But not for long, I ended up in management. I loved you from the moment I felt you inside my belly, flailing your tiny arms. I stumbled across this site when looking for some comfort or some direction in how to get my son to speak to me. Requiring you to be the best student you can be. We must embrace all of the little things in life. I wonder how memory will color me in your eyes. An Unread Letter – To My Schizophrenic Son By James E. Stone, Sr. (I cried reading Elaine’s memoirs a bunch of times. Ex did something that negatively impacted 38 year old son. My Father is a Magistrate or Judge so this should tell you how important child support or the check was, or wasn’t. He refuses to have anything to do with me and I don’t know why. Hang onto those letters. It’s always the children that are left with questions. Besides, shedding a few (or more) tears is always good for the soul. I kept you clean. [] Whether she is years, months, weeks, or days away from getting married, you are going to want to clearly communicate some key things to the man who will become her husbandAnd I think a letter is a great way to do it. 2. But every now and then he’ll inform me, “Hey, Ma, I was reading your blog last night!” . . I think you do. I agree with you completely. This is the nature of things. Maybe I wasn’t perfect, but I tried hard to be the best single mom I could be. Fri 4 Feb 2011 19.05 EST. "Xxxxx, my only child, my son, I put you first from the day u were born until the day you left home, over 20 years from the time I learned of you and later felt u move inside me. That includes: Making sure you are respectful. Never before have I read a memoir, and I was impressed with the light manner in which this story was written. He’s left home and gone to university, so when he comes home with piles of washing it’s only natural for me to slot into my maternal role again. I’m sure your bond with all of your children is strong, especially your daughter, whom I know you have but didn’t mention here. I don’t know what to say to my father. For your words, your emotions, your encouragement, your love. Ex and I are still friends. Having lived with a Dad that was ill my entire life you don’t take life for granted, not one second. Sometimes he reads my posts – but I never know when since he never comments. Please let me know if – or when – things improve!!! I’m writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast. I know I will always be his Mom and we have an extraordinary bond. 8 Best Water Purifier in India (2020) – Latest Buyer’s Guide, 30 Days or Less to Freelance Writing Success, 30 Days or Less to Virtual Assistant Success, Why My Focus is on Freelance Editing (+ Why I Stopped Freelance Writing), Everything You Need to Know about Page Jumps, Guest Posting and Guest Hosting: Best Practices, G Suite and 5 Ways It Can Benefit Bloggers and Entrepreneurs, Why Becoming an Author Can Help Your Business (and How to Become One, Easily! Thanks, Elaine! Sure, you’re a great writer, editor, and all of that; but most people do not hang theirs close out to dry in the front yard, you do. He knows how much my blog means to me, and is very encouraging of my pursuit of a career in writing. I want my son, I need my son, my whole body aches for him. My heart is heartbroken he refuses to talk to me. My Son is 21 . Then a mutual friend told me his mother opens and reads his mail. In my case I pray one day he will love me and forgive me for leaving his father. Police would have to pick me up and take me home. I pretended to talk to him when I came home after my first day at a new school in 4th grade. ), Aww, bless you Lorraine, I just write what I feel and I mean every word , Yes, it will be very interesting to see what other feedback you get here from the men , I don’t have too many male readers (from what I can tell); maybe a dozen. Your letter touched places deep.in my heart for obvious reasons. I love Chicago. More troubling, the cards and letters I sent contained money, $300 to $500 each.
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